Waiting For Todog

SNAKE OIL HUCKSTERS

It is the worst of times and it is the worst of times. (Apologies to Charles Dickens — there is no best.)

These are just rotten times all around. Everybody’s in it. The virus keeps advancing like a freaking alien army, the Dreaded Spikes from the Land of Covid, mutating, rotating, gyrating, contorting, morphing into variants and deviants and aberrant preversions, the Delta variant and the United variant and the Qantas variant and the Air China variant, screwing with the heads of stinking rich Big Pharma snake oil hucksters who trot out untested poisonous cocktails that Doctor Tiny Faustus, chief medical liar to the prez, sez will save your life even though people are dying from them, be a good little sheep, get jabbed, get spiked, live a short painful life, I am your shepherd, the good doctor, Follow Me, and I’ll make you wish you were dead, don’t listen to the horror stories of the bad vax reactionaries, they live in a fantasy world of reality, their blood clots are mere bumps on the road to hell, their seizures are illusions, their hallucinations are delusions, their paralysis is a phantasy.

What’s a body to do? Forget the body, focus on the soul. The soul is the essence of the human being, the essential you, who you really are, what makes you tick but not tock, a hardwired part of the mind but not the body, forget the body, go deep into your mind, sit here quietly, smoke some weed, drink gin and tonic, the tonic contains quinine, an ingredient in hydroxychloroquine that treats lupus and rheumatoid arthritis and malaria and, wouldn’t you know it! Covidfckng19, yeah, yeah, yeah, just sit here and get stoned and mellow and wait for a giant meteor to crash into the earth.

O, happy day!


Header art Ralph Steadman


Back to the front page

We are doomed

We are DOOMED

The planet earth has been sick for years. It has emphysema from breathing its own carbon emissions. The smokestacks of industry are gargantuan cigarettes. Terminal cancer is not far off.

(The Captains of Industry finally yanked the TV commercials — 🎶 Smokestacks smell good / Like a smokestack should. 🎶)

And now the planet’s population is sick. Millions of people are infected with the deadly virus. Many have already died. Others have died or been sickened by the vaccines. Entire countries are in lockdown. Disruptions in the food supply chain are causing dire shortages and soaring prices. 

The world’s defense forces are at a low level of capability. Armies and air forces around the world have been weakened by the virus.

All in all, this is a perfect time to hear from the occupants of those mystery craft that dart around the sky in startling ways far beyond the possibilities of our physical laws.

What the fuck is that!

In short, this small sick planet is easy pickings for Whoever Or Whatever is Out There (WOWOT).

Even if they are peaceful, you know it’s going to end badly. Our stupid HUTA* politicians will make fearful knee-jerk decisions to scramble warplanes with orders to fire on command.

Obviously it will be a one-sided battle. This tiny blue dot in the vast black void will be turned into a cinder in no time flat.

As E.E. Cummings wrote: ‘Pity this busy monster, manunkind.’


*Heads up their ass


Back to the front page

State of the World

In a word: Doomed

The world used to be a dance floor

The world used to be a dance floor full of sensuality, a sports stadium crowded with excitement, a beach packed with pleasure, a tavern cheerful with camaraderie.

The world has shrunk. It wears a mask. It is chaos incarnate.

The world is now the inside of a house. For many it is the inside of a room. People are prisoners. The sports stadium and the tavern and the dance floor and the beach are empty.

Prisoners are permitted to go outside for food and necessary supplies but they must wear a mask and keep as far away from their fellow humans as possible. Essential workers are allowed out to go to their jobs but it is a double-edged sword for they run the risk of getting the deadly disease and infecting their families.

The fools who are in charge, the so-called leaders of the world have no idea how to deal with the crisis. People are going insane. They are rioting in the streets, killing each other, setting fire to buildings, torching police cars, tearing down statues. They say they are raging against racism but many of the rioters are racists themselves. They say they are fighting a revolution for change but the result is chaos.

NO WAY OUT

Peaceful citizens do not join the revolution. They stay inside and watch the madness on television. Many go mad just watching it. They see no way out.

Beautiful young women who used to have fun on the dance floor and at the beach and in the taverns kill themselves. Men who are laid off from their jobs and cannot feed their children kill themselves. Nurses who have caught the disease and are afraid of affecting others kill themselves.

In the midst of this insanity despicable politicians obsessed with power fight among themselves and issue contradictory dictatorial rules and regulations and lie through their teeth that a vote for them will stop the virus and heal the country and blah blah blah.

But the rampaging mobs in the streets yell bullshit and the people locked away in isolation see no hope and buy a one-way ticket to oblivion.


I never thought I’d die alone
I laughed the loudest who’d have known?


1-800-273-8255


Back to the front page