Tag: Novel

Still stoned after all these years

Paraphrasing Paul Simon song title—thanks Paul.

The writing life can sometimes go real slow like when you’re stoned and everything is alowly stopped even while life is flashing by like a subway train. I wrote the first sentence of the Great Australian Novel ten years ago:

The first time I saw Didgeridoo Budoo he was walking along Bungalow Street with a flowerpot on his head.

The working title was and still is I guess ‘Nerve Sprike Tan’ which is Australian for ‘nervous breakdown’ as in ‘He’ll ever nerve sprike tan the waze goan.’ — ‘He’ll have a nervous breakdown the way he’s going.’

The phrase is from the book ‘Let Stalk Strine’ (Let’s Talk Australian) by Afferbeck Lauder* (Australian for Alphabetical Order), the pseudonym of writer Alastair Morrison.

The novel is about halfway finished. At this rate I reckon I’ll be mailing the completed manuscript to God. I hope He likes it.


*https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Afferbeck_Lauder


ADDENDUM: The above was posted around midnight after several drinks — at the time it seemed amusing, but in the sober light of day, not so much. I could delete it, but what the hell.


 

Guido Michelini — an update

Guido Michelini came to these shores

and sated himself with a hundred whores.

A good reporter but a total flake

he left job after job in a wild wake.

But he kept writing this one damn novel

and ended up in a wretched hovel.

Unkempt and shabby he let himself go,

the death of his wife a merciless blow.

But never say die he told me today

I am on my way to a huge payday.

This fucking book will justify my life

and then I’ll get the gun and join my wife.