Tag: Death

With Renata de Dios

Man without a compass

Everyone, every body on this grain of sand in our infinite Universe is at the mercy of a microscopic mystery bug that kills thousands and potentially millions of people.

Everyone on earth, from tradesmen to nurses to movie stars, can become infected. Death is on everyone’s mind. We need courage and a boundless spirit of togetherness and humanity to survive this.

People of a certain age who live alone are the most vulnerable. They face not only the virus but the despair and stress of being alone. They fear being stricken with no one to help them, or even know they are gravely ill. They could be lying on the floor of their house for days before someone might decide to check on them.

This is a desperately lonely dilemma for them. They need someone to look after them, or at least be aware of their existence and look in on them at times like this. But that may never happen. People have their own lives and deaths to worry about.

A man in his seventies recently lost his wife and over the years has lost his son and two brothers. He has no family left. He is one of those people who could collapse with no one in the house to call for help, or anyone, in fact, who might think to check in on him from time to time because he has no friends in his isolated world.

Then, not long ago, a friend of his deceased wife from thirty years ago contacted him with her condolences and they have kept in touch. She says she is a messenger from God. Her very name, Renata de Dios, means “Born again of God.” She came out of the past to help this man of little to no faith.

His wife, being raised Catholic was a believer, and when he held her hand in Intensive Care as she lay dying, that was a consolation to him. And throughout the past thirteen months since her death he has prayed, in his own faltering way, for a sign from her or from her God that she is “somewhere” now and not lost forever in an oblivion of emptiness. But he has never received the slightest sensation of any communion with her or felt even a hint of her presence in his lowly bungalow.

Renata de Dios persevered. During their many telephone conversation she has tried to direct him to the “road to God.” He doesn’t rebuff her or her faith but he doesn’t embrace it. He tells her it’s not like a light switch you can suddenly turn on. You have to feel it in your heart. You have to believe it.

Once, a few weeks back, he actually set out on the road to God, only to lose his way and wander off into another wilderness of despair.

The guy seems like a hopeless case, but Renata de Dios keeps trying. What have you got to lose? she said. Give it another shot, I’m here for you, I’ll guide you.

What will this man do? What would you do? Stay tuned for the next episode of Man Without a Compass.

The eternal question

The Unanswerable Question That Haunts The God Seeker

It is interesting that the word quest, as in spiritual quest, so easily becomes the word question.

Questioning every aspect of life — from mundane matters to profound spiritual beliefs — is what keeps the human mind engaged.

And the question that transcends all questions, in my opinion, is and always will be: Is there God? Not a God, but God, purely and simply (although hardly simple), God.

Whether we admit it or not, that question, if not always in our cluttered minds, is certainly in our hearts.


The agnostic and to some extent the atheist will say the question is of zero interest to them. Their minds are made up — there is no God. But that kind of arrogance is as annoying as the crazed fervor of some evangelists.

The non- and never-believers want evidence that God exists. Faith isn’t enough for them.

But such evidence is currently, and possibly as impossibly unfathomable and unknowable as radio waves were to the cavemen of a million years ago. Yet radio waves and other “miracles” in the electromagnetic spectrum were in fact ultimately revealed over time — as unknown others may also be discovered in an impossible universe where, I suggest, anything is possible.


If there is God, then all is well with life — and death. But if there is no God we are all lost. Life, in the end — even though we may have had a “good life” — becomes an empty shell, a cosmic fraud, a godless dirty trick. If that is the case, for one thing, the main thing I would say, we will never be reunited or in communion in some unknown Godly and mystical way with our lost loved ones.

We will mourn them for the rest of our lives and stubbornly live in the hope and prayers we will be with them — again, in that unknown and unknowable way — but if that hope is false and all our prayers are based on a diabolical delusion inflicted upon us by a flawed theology and a Christian concept that is contradicted by history and science and common sense, then we are all doomed to oblivion and the nothingness that existed before we were born, when we knew nothing, experienced nothing, were aware of nothing because we didn’t exist and were in fact nonexistent.


Therefore, in order to survive the tragedies in life, one creates or at least imagines a spiritual place or space, a realm, a supernatural sphere, a dimension, and as-yet undiscovered wave-length within a universe of 200 billion galaxies — call it Heaven if you want — where one may, however remotely, but hope-beyond-hopefully, find the spirit, the soul if you will, of lost loved ones; because even if one doesn’t believe in God, one believed and continues to believe in our loved ones — whether they be wife, husband, soulmate, companion, child, sister, brother, best friend, whomever.

They were real. But now they are dead and no longer real, one can only hope that they are surreal and therefore spiritually communicable. But if that is not the reality, by which of course in this context I mean the surreality, then all is lost and emptiness and meaningless awaits us all.