Quoth the Jackdaw: Caw, caw, caw


The Testament According to the Jackdaw of Unreason

Belief in God goes against reason. Believing in a fantastic realm of a glorious Afterlife is irrational.

Reason stands like a pillar of logic on a solid foundation of fact. The reason the sun will come up tomorrow is because it has been coming up for 4.5 billion years and it’s perfectly logical — in fact, it’s a fact — that it will come up tomorrow.

Reason is rational, reason is sanity. Believing in God is irrational and insane. Only a lunatic could believe in God.

Enter the Jackdaw of Unreason. He believes in God. The very reason he’s called the Jackdaw of Unreason is because it doesn’t take reason to believe in God it takes unreason.

But, Jackdaw, saith I, playing the devil’s advocate, why would you believe in a God who calls you — that is, the jackdaw, the screech owl, the short-eared owl, the little owl, the fisher owl, the white owl, the eagle, the vulture, the buzzard, the falcon, the raven, the hawk, the stork, the heron, the ostrich, the sea gull and the bat — “an abomination” among the birds? [Leviticus 11:13-19]

The Mad Bird of Metropolis

Does that seem unreasonable to you? the jackdaw slyly asks.

Yes it does, say I, falling into his trap.

I rest my case, he says with a wink of the eye.

The jackdaw is a lunatic. Not the kind of lunatic whose insanity derives from the phases of the moon, but a bona fide genuine madman, I mean madbird.

The jackdaw tells someone with reason, Forget your reason, get some unreason.

Reason won’t get you to Heaven. But unreason will. Furthermore, quoth the jackdaw, faith is unreason. Faith is believing in something when there is no proof that it exists. Faith is irrational.

Get some faith, says the jackdaw. Don’t question it, just stand firm like an irrational lunatic on a fantastic unfoundation of unreason.

Ah, that jackdaw, he’s one crazy bird.

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  1. Problem is, that loony bird of unreason has been whispering sweet nothings into our ears now for thousands upon thousands of years. And the weak and needy have listened, his followers numbering in the billions today. It’s way past time someone put an end to his fanatical story-telling madness. You got a gun Bill, next time you see him perched in a tree do the world a favor and end this once and for all!

  2. Ha-ha, you gave me a good laugh with that one, El Corko, but nah, I wouldn’t shoot my feathered friend, besides, my cat likes to chase him away.