Dreams of dead wife

Dreams of S.

You wake with a start. Your heart is racing. You reach across the bed to touch your wife. “Are you okay, honey?” She’s not there, of course.

You realize it was a dream. She was in danger. You try to remember the details, but the details are lost in the darkness. You look at the digital clock on the bedside table — 3:11 a.m. 

That was her birthday — March the 11th. Coincidence? You realize today’s date — November the 21st. She died eleven months ago today.

Was this a rehearsal for the main event — December 21st? Will the bedroom be filled with the ghosts of dead loved ones for the occasion? The four men — your father, two brothers and your son — all dressed in black. Your son was a bit of a card — perhaps he will wear a black top hat so he can doff it to you. Your mother will wear that beautiful black dress she wore at the funeral of her first-born son, killed in a car crash at the age of twenty-four.

And when the digital clock clicks to 3:11 and you wake with a start and reach out and touch the empty pillow, someone will be singing ‘Hallelujah’ — Leonard Cohen of course.

It will be a beautiful event. Don’t miss it.

6 thoughts on “Dreams of S.

  1. That’s good Steve, WVKR is a great station. I was sorry when Leonard Cohen died, but we will always have his music

  2. .

    When i was younger, dear Sir, i was trying to rationalize a few things. Partially, because i was a bit scared with a few things – and all i wanted was to forget them by placing them to some kind of a spiritual/mind garbage can. But they were always there with me, and still are. – and partially because i couldn’t believe that a few things may belong to some kind of another sphere of realization. And partially, of course, because of the environment, and the people around.

    Now, i think -or i suspect-if you wish- that this was wrong, and that this is an area that we should investigate, instead of placing these phaenomena under the general category of the so-called “coincidence”. Something that has the tendency to repeat itself stops to belong to this category, according to the specialists. On the other hand, the “specialists” on the field are incapable to do so, to investigate. Actually, most of them feel well by writing prescriptions and by giving pills to the people, without having an answer, not even an understanding for a chain of things or problems. I think they feel comfortable by creating categories and by giving weird names to different kind of problems using acronyms. Acronyms have become some kind of fashion. They just only suspect, like you and me, which means they do not deserve the title of the “specialist”. They are not specialists at all. They are bad actors. It’s not their fault, though. They were taught to act like this. Not all of them, but most of them.

    And because they must have an answer for everything and anything, they ‘ll tell someone who has experiences like yours that he/she loses his/her mind, and many more. Instead of simply saying ” you know something, i don’t know. Despite the fact i’m a specialist, i do not know. And despite the fact that same things have happened to my life, i don’t know. Listen, take this pill to relax, to get some sleep, not that the pill will solve the problem or that the pill will give an answer. And here’s a place where we discuss similar things. We are interested to listen, to keep records, and to study the phaenomena, no matter if they belong to the category we have the tendency to call “metaphysical, or whatever”.

    Take care, dear Sir. My apologies for this long, and, probably, weird comment.

  3. Thank you, dear friend, for this. It is something I must re-read, it has a soulful of meaning and relevance that I want to ponder.

  4. Yes, I see, many of these “specialists“ were trained in physical science not in metaphysics, the natural and not the supernatural, and so yes, all they can say is take this pill and that pill, and doctors have prescribed such pills to me but when I take them (except for Xanax) I hallucinate and my body rebels with disturbing symptoms so I stop taking them and let my natural and possibly supernatural mind, my imagination in fact, try and deal with the situation, and if not find answers, then search for them, maybe the answers are out there and maybe they’re not but the seeking does no harm and if it ends in nothingness at least your searching mind will have travelled into areas beyond your own immediate pain and grief. As a backup, there’s always Jack Daniels and Xanax. Gouliélmos.

  5. .

    ” […] seeking does no harm and if it ends in nothingness at least your searching mind will have travelled … ”

    _ – Wonderfully said, dear Sir.