Death rocker

Kurt Cobain remembered

Kurt Cobain barricaded himself in the greenhouse above the garage of his Seattle home by propping a stool against the door.

In a rambling suicide note, he said his baby daughter would have a better life without him:

“I can’t stand the thought of Frances becoming the miserable, self-destructive, death rocker that I’ve become.”

Kurt Cobain remembered
Courtney Love, Kurt and baby Frances

It was April 8, 1994. Kurt Cobain was 27.

Original post HERE.

Back to the front page

Shotgun to the head

Generation X guru and Nirvana front man Kurt Cobain died from the blast of a 20-gauge shotgun on April 5, 1994. He was 27.

Kurt Cobain suicide at 27
His body wasn’t discovered until April 8th. He had barricaded himself in the greenhouse above the garage of his Seattle home by propping a stool against the door.
Kurt Cobain suicide at 27
Kurt Cobain’s garage


Inside the greenhouse, Kurt apparently took some drugs from a cigar box that contained his stash and wrote a rambling, emotional note in red ink. He placed his wallet on the floor, open to his Washington driver’s license, which friends believe was to help the police identify him.

Kurt Cobain suicide at 27

Some claim the rock superstar was murdered — and there is ballistic evidence that could support that. The weapon was a Remington 20-gauge shotgun with an ejector on the RIGHT side of the gun. But photos of the death scene show that the bullet shell ended up to the LEFT of Kurt’s body.
If he had shot himself, murder theorists say it would be impossible for the shell to exit the gun and end up on the other side of the room. Besides which, he had three times the lethal dosage of heroin in his system which would have killed him anyway.


But the consensus is suicide. And I think it was to spare his baby daughter Frances from growing up with a bipolar drug-addicted father who was going insane.


My circled emphasis shows that he killed himself because: “I can’t stand the thought of Frances becoming the miserable, self-destructive, death rocker that I’ve become.” And that “her life will be so much happier without me.”


But the murder theory sticks — and the suspect is Courtney Love, his wife and mother of his daughter. Their relationship had been tempestuous and violent. But what was her motive?

A month before his death, Kurt reportedly told his Los Angeles lawyer, Rosemary Carroll, that he wanted Courtney out of his will because he was planning to file for divorce.

He also said he planned to quit Nirvana and the music business because he couldn’t handle the fame, and it infuriated Courtney that he would walk away from his $10-million career.

Money, fame and drug, murder theorists claim, gave Courtney the motive to kill her husband.

Nirvana — Smells Like Teen Spirit


To Boddah

Speaking from the tongue of an experienced simpleton who obviously would rather be an emasculated, infantile complain-ee. This note should be pretty easy to understand.

All the warnings from the punk rock 101 courses over the years, since my first introduction to the, shall we say, ethics involved with independence and the embracement of your community has proven to be very true. I haven’t felt the excitement of listening to as well as creating music along with reading and writing for too many years now. I feel guilty beyond words about these things.

For example, when we’re back stage and the lights go out and the manic roar of the crowds begins, it doesn’t affect me the way in which it did for Freddie Mercury, who seemed to love, relish in the love and adoration from the crowd which is something I totally admire and envy. The fact is, I can’t fool you, any one of you. It simply isn’t fair to you or me. The worst crime I can think of would be to rip people off by faking it and pretending as if I’m having 100% fun. Sometimes I feel as if I should have a punch-in time clock before I walk out on stage. I’ve tried everything within my power to appreciate it (and I do, God, believe me, I do, but it’s not enough). I appreciate the fact that I and we have affected and entertained a lot of people. It must be one of those narcissists who only appreciate things when they’re gone. I’m too sensitive. I need to be slightly numb in order to regain the enthusiasms I once had as a child.

On our last 3 tours, I’ve had a much better appreciation for all the people I’ve known personally, and as fans of our music, but I still can’t get over the frustration, the guilt and empathy I have for everyone. There’s good in all of us and I think I simply love people too much, so much that it makes me feel too fucking sad. The sad little, sensitive, unappreciative, Pisces, Jesus man. Why don’t you just enjoy it? I don’t know!

I have a goddess of a wife who sweats ambition and empathy and a daughter who reminds me too much of what I used to be, full of love and joy, kissing every person she meets because everyone is good and will do her no harm. And that terrifies me to the point to where I can barely function. I can’t stand the thought of Frances becoming the miserable, self-destructive, death rocker that I’ve become.

I have it good, very good, and I’m grateful, but since the age of seven, I’ve become hateful towards all humans in general. Only because it seems so easy for people to get along that have empathy. Only because I love and feel sorry for people too much I guess.

Thank you all from the pit of my burning, nauseous stomach for your letters and concern during the past years. I’m too much of an erratic, moody baby! I don’t have the passion anymore, and so remember, it’s better to burn out than to fade away.

Peace, love, empathy.
Kurt Cobain

Frances and Courtney, I’ll be at your alter.
Please keep going Courtney, for Frances.
For her life, which will be so much happier without me.




Back to the front page

‘Tears are falling and I feel the pain’


I’m walking in the rain

Tears are falling and I feel the pain

Wishing you were here by me

To end this misery

On February 8, 1990, Del Shannon, whose megahit ‘Runaway’ had rocketed to the top of the Billboard charts, shot himself in the head with a .22 caliber rifle. He was 55.

His wife, LeAnne, returned to their home in Santa Clarita, Califoria, at 11:30 pm from shopping to find him slumped in a chair, the rifle next to his body.

Del Shannon, whose real name was Charles Westover, suffered from depression and alcoholism. Shortly before killing himself he had started taking the antidepressant Prozac.


LeAnne sued Eli Lilly, the manufacturer of Prozac, alleging it contributed to his suicide. The lawsuit claimed the company did not properly test the drug and failed to warn doctors of its possible side effects.

His behavior became erratic when he started on Prozac, his wife said, drastically altering his moods and personality.

Del Shannon suicide questioned

The suit was eventually dropped, but the case brought attention to the possible connection between suicides and drugs like Prozac.


Del Shannon’s 1961 hit ‘Runaway’ sold at a rate of 80,000 singles a day, and became the theme song for the NBC drama series Crime Story that ran for two seasons from 1986 to 1988.

Del Shannon, who was born in Grand Rapids, Michigan, was inducted into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame in 1999, and into the Michigan Rock and Roll Legends Hall of Fame in 2005.

Back to the front page